Betty Elaine Berggren Cole

Betty Elaine Berggren Cole, age 97, of Pleasant Hill, TN, passed away on December 8, 2025, at Cumberland Medical Center, held in the love of family. Born September 3, 1928, in Chicago, Illinois, she was the daughter of Eric and Charlotte (Gunderson) Berggren.

Betty grew up in a close-knit Norwegian neighborhood, her parents both first-generation Americans. Her grandparents’ Norwegian and Swedish traditions, the Lutheran faith that permeated her home, and a family marked by curiosity and grit—her grandfather a renowned deep-water diver, her father a professional inventor, her mother a working woman who drove a Model T—helped form the values and strengths that guided her life. A child of immigrants and the Depression, she never took citizenship or money for granted, a lesson she impressed upon her daughters when she scolded them once for placing pennies on the railroad tracks behind their house.

The first in her family to attend college, Betty graduated from St. Olaf. Her interest in sociology and psychology later drew her to night classes at Northwestern University in Chicago, where she met her future husband, Ted Fonda Cole. Together they embraced a life of service as United Methodist missionaries in Taiwan, teaching at Tainan Theological College.

Betty was devoted to her vocation as an English teacher and actively engaged in local life. She spoke Mandarin—tinged with a Chicago accent—with students and neighbors alike, welcoming students into her home for questions, conversation, and social time.

Her work life was balanced with family life and the raising of three spirited daughters. They kept her busy with tropical illnesses, school demands, and occasional tests of her boundaries (including the memorable escape from an afternoon nap by climbing out a bedroom window and shimmying down a tree), as well as earnest questions like, “If God created me, who created God?” Betty met all of this with patience and steady attention.

She enjoyed creative projects, sewing their clothes from McCall patterns, devising imaginative birthday games, and creating memorable Halloween costumes—including one ill-fated year when she dressed them as a crepe-paper clown family. She appreciated each daughter’s individuality and listened without judgment, gently guiding when needed—more often simply listening. Her heart was soft, her discipline rarely stern, and she often worried, her concerns ranging from her children’s well-being to whether she had left the stove on or misplaced her keys.

She also modeled a quiet moral courage. Daughter Lucia recounts a time during the late 1960s, when the family was living in Evanston, Illinois. After the assassination of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., Betty got a phone call from her own mother—who referred to Dr. King as “a troublemaker”—which shook her deeply. Lucia recalled how “Mama’s usual signs of worry became a full-body, visceral shake we had never seen.”

Betty ended the call and made a simple, resolute decision: she and her daughters would sit together and watch Dr. King’s entire funeral on their small black-and-white television. As Lucia wrote, “In Mama’s small way, she was supporting his continued message by showing her daughters… her strong belief in equality for all.” In that quiet act, Betty taught her children that justice and dignity are not just spoken ideals, but values to be lived and passed on.

A turbulent chapter for her and her family was her divorce and the need to reshape her life in upper middle age. She returned to Taiwan to teach in the English Department at Tunghai University, remaining there until her retirement. When a retired colleague at Uplands Village in Pleasant Hill, TN, recommended the community, she moved there in November 1994, and Tennessee became her home for more than 30 years.

After moving to Uplands Retirement Village, Betty remained engaged in service and creativity—volunteering at a preschool and as a docent (community guide) at Uplands’ Pioneer Hall Museum, staying active with United Methodist Women, and attending worship at the United Methodist Church in Crossville, and later, when travel became difficult, at Pleasant Hill Community Church, often staying for Sunday dinner with friends. She enjoyed quilting groups, the Bryan Symphony Orchestra in Cookeville, and theater—participating in Armchair Theater over the years and playing bingo with devotion in Memory Care. Never having taken up driving, she walked most places in the retirement community. A voracious reader, largely of fiction, her library was so extensive that neighbors regularly borrowed books.

In later years, Betty found a devoted companion in her cat, Fluffer, who appeared on her doorstep in 2011 and soon became part of her daily routines. They shared small adventures, including walks together on a leash—rituals that continued even after Betty moved to assisted living. Reflecting Uplands’ commitment to the Eden Alternative philosophy, Fluffer became the first non-human resident welcomed into the community, her calming presence opening the door for other four-legged companions.

When Fluffer died earlier this year, Betty’s dementia made the loss especially hard. A member of the Memory Care staff found a robotic cat resembling Fluffer, whose meows, purrs, and paw-licks brought comfort and allowed Betty’s caregiving spirit to continue.

Aging and memory loss brought challenges, as well as gifts. Betty’s sense of humor, playful theatrics—she liked to do a little song and dance—and her frankness became more apparent. She benefited from the support of devoted Memory Care staff, who described her as a joy to care for, with a sweet, willing, and resilient nature—often participating in activities even on difficult days.

That determination was especially clear after a serious bout of pneumonia this past September left her weak and in rehabilitation for over two months. Through continued effort and the encouragement of physical therapy staff, she regained strength and mobility, learning a simple phrase of self-talk: “I’ve got this.” When she returned home to Memory Care, she impressed staff with her level of activity and eagerness to engage.

A fall in December led to injuries from which she could not recover. Family were touched by the care and kindness of staff and friends, who spoke openly of their affection for Betty and their feelings of loss. The family is grateful that, before her illness, Betty celebrated her 97th birthday with the Uplands community. She was surrounded by staff, residents, family, and longtime friends—together, sharing stories and expressing gratitude for her life and the quiet goodness she offered so freely to those around her.

Most important to Betty was her family. She showed no favoritism, delighting in and worrying for each of them. She never missed recognizing a birthday, anniversary, or holiday, and celebrated many milestones. Her grandchildren and son-in-law share their memories:

Grandson Andrew Yu recalled Betty as remarkably attentive, listening carefully even when the topic wasn’t her favorite. “Grandma was one of the nicest and kindest people I have ever known,” he said. He fondly remembered that she always kept a puzzle in her room. “As I grow older and find myself enjoying puzzles more, I know I’ll think of her every time I sit down to start one. It will always remind me of those quiet comforting moments we shared and how lucky I was to have her as my grandma.”

Andrew’s wife, Thao, remembered the first time she met Betty, recounting her delight in trying on Vietnamese slippers Thao brought, showing her around her room, and introducing her to Fluffer. Betty also correctly pronounced Thao’s name on the first try, which made her feel immediately at home. Thao recalled a visit in August during a road trip to upstate New York: “She recognized me right away and greeted me with ‘Hi, Thao,’ and when we showed her my engagement ring, she let out the sweetest ‘Oooooo,’ full of excitement. I could see pure happiness spark in her eyes. That image of her will stay with me forever—her joy, her warmth and the way she made me feel like family.”

Austin Yu, Betty’s son-in-law, noted their bonding over a shared love of sports—first as a Cubs fan, later following the Tennessee Titans—and her subtle, thoughtful ways. “She never disagreed for the sake of it; if she had a different opinion, she would mention it and let differences be differences,” he said. He remembered the little gestures, like her head nod when thinking, and summed up her presence: “She was always engaging and welcoming. I will miss her very much.”

Granddaughter Caroline Yu spoke of her deep bond with her grandmother: “I feel such profound sadness because Grandma was someone I loved very much, and who loved me very much.” She recalls the warm glow of the family home guestroom in Ann Arbor, where she spent cherished Christmas visits with Grandma. Even while watching shows like Two and a Half Men—“I’m sure I didn’t understand a sliver of what was going on”—Caroline felt comforted simply by being with her grandmother, surrounded by her puzzles, sewing, and closet full of cozy winter clothes. As a young girl prone to anxiety, she says, Grandma made her feel “safe and cradled,” offering a steadfast calm and special kindness that lingered long after those visits ended.

Caroline offers a fitting close with these words, honoring the enduring legacy of memory Betty leaves for everyone who knew her: “I’ll miss not having Grandma physically here with us, but, thankfully, everywhere I look, she is there. I can feel Grandma in the city of Chicago, her hometown, in my American Girl dolls, which she crafted perfect doll clothes for, all over the mountains and hills of west Tennessee, in my prayer box pendant hanging on my jewelry stand, in every piggy and kitty I have the pleasure of happening across — Grandma remains there, solid and strong and real.”

Betty is survived by her daughters Lucia Anne Yu (Dr. Austin T. Yu) and Lois Aileen Cole; and grandchildren Andrew Teh-An Yu (Thao Doung) and Caroline Teh-Ai Yu. She was preceded in death by her daughter Lani Alaine Gerity Glanville, and her parents.

Plans for a celebration of her life in the spring will be announced at a later time. Gifts in her memory may be made to some of her favorite causes: Doctors Without Borders, The Sierra Club, World Wildlife Fund, or Public Television (PBS).

Arrangements and care provided by Bilbrey Funeral Home and Cremation Service.